Kids Without Compassion

In both schools of Buddhism the emphasis seems to be on transforming human nature from what it is natural to a different nature where loving kindness is valued over selfish gain. The question I have though, is whether that is in fact the 'natural' human condition, to be selfish?

There was recently an article on NewsWeek about "kids who lack compassion". There was a study where children were told stories of other children, some of whom were lucky and others who were not. When asked who they would prefer to befriend, the answer was consistently the children who were luckier. Ergo children inherently lack compassion, and compassion is something they learn later in life. You can read the article here:http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/16286475/site/newsweek/page/1

Many people see this as sign of hopelessness, that there is no future for a compassionate humanity if by our very nature we are born to be selfish. Some even cite evolution as being the cause of this condition. However I disagree.

The problem is not with the children. Children are born, for the most part, as blank slates. Of course they have emotions that are based on selfish gain, that is a matter of survival, but when it comes to their values these are mostly learnt from their parents and environment. If the parents value a boy who finds $5 as being lucky, then so will the children. If the parents value beauty over personality then so will the children.

What if the child who found $5 then used it to buy his first pack of cigarettes? What if the boy who lost that $5 learnt a valuable lesson about looking after his money? Who is the lucker one? Learning values requires looking deeply, and children do have a natural capacity for looking deeply but only if it is nurtured by their parents.

In a nurturing environment children learn that survival can be attained without the need for aggressive behavior. Children learn values of compassion by seeing their parents value compassion, by seeing their children being mindful and looking deeply and not acting on impule and emotion.

This is not a matter of natural selection in evolution, it is not a matter of original sin as some may claim. To say that is dismissing the actual problem, and dispelling our responsibility as a society. This is a problem that can be solved and the solution is in our hands.